Not a Harmless Joke: Speaking Out Against Homophobia

Homophobia can’t be that big of an issue anymore. Take Canada for example, gay marriage has been legal for here nineteen years, conversion therapy was banned back in January of 2022, and Toronto is considered one of the most queer-friendly cities in the world. Or at least, that’s what most people would think. But the fight against homophobia and discrimination towards the 2SLGBTQIA+ community does not stop at marriage, it goes beyond our legal systems and requires us to examine our internal biases—the media we consume, the things we say, and the way we perceive gender roles. The issues caused by homophobia aren’t restricted to one sector of our society, and they don’t just harm the  2SLGBTQIA+ community—it’s interwoven in the fabric of our society, constantly in the background of how we interact with each other.

The Trevor Project—an American non-profit committed to ending suicide amongst 2SLGBTQIA+ youth—reported that suicide is the third leading cause of death amongst those aged 15-24, and youth who identified as  2SLGBTQIA+ were at an increased risk, as they were four times more likely to commit suicide than their heterosexual and cisgender peers. 2SLGBTQIA+ youth of colour are also more likely to commit suicide than their white peers.

But what’s behind these statistics? It’s not like 2SLGBTQIA+ youth are more likely to commit suicide just on the basis of them being queer. This report speaks to larger societal issues of how we perceive, interact with, speak about, and support—or more accurately, do not support—2SLGBTQIA+ youth.

Well, the 2SLGBTQIA+ community has historically accounted for a large number of Canadians who are either homeless, or at risk of being homeless, at 25%-40% of homeless youth—meaning 1 in 3. Queer youth who are kicked out of their homes, or who run away after coming out often avoid homeless shelters due to fear of encountering homophobia. The issue of housing doesn’t only exist amongst queer youth, 2SLGBTQIA+ seniors who enter care homes/long-term care communities often feel pressured to go back into the closet in fear of encountering discrimination from their caretakers or the other residents.

Bisexual youth reported higher rates of depression, bullying, sexual assault, and physical harm. A survey conducted in Québec found that homophobic bullying was high amongst gay and lesbian teenagers, with gay boys experiencing it at a rate that was nearly three times higher (46.9% to 16.5%). 74% of queer Canadian students have been verbally harassed for their gender expression, 28% experienced cyberbullying, and 21% experienced physical harassment or assault. 64% of queer students said they felt unsafe at their schools, a number that is both high on its own and in comparison with their heterosexual peers (15.2%).

98% of high school students have heard the phrase ‘that’s so gay’ being thrown around at school, and that might seem inconsequential—after all, it’s just a joke. Similarly, a study of rugby players below the age of 20 found that 78% of participants had heard teammates use homophobic slurs, and they did not speak out against it as it was only being said jokingly. Despite their defense of it, it is important to note that 71% of the participants admitted rugby would be a lot more enjoyable if these homophobic jokes weren’t being made at all. 

A lack of homophobic language would also make the sporting world a lot more enjoyable for youth who identify as 2SLGBTQIA+, a sample released by the Trevor Project revealed that 68% of queer youth don’t participate in sports—not because they’re somehow genetically predisposition against athleticism—but because they have been discriminated against, or fear being discriminated against.

“Locker rooms were a particular source of stress for LGBTQ youth, with one youth reporting “girls in my class don’t want me to change in the locker room with them because they think I’ll stare at them/hit on them because I’m lesbian”.” Another explained, “I never hated sports, but I hated how I was treated by kids and adults who played sports. The locker room was always a nightmare, the athletic kids at my school hated me, the coaches at my school hated me, and as much as I didn’t care for a lot of mainstream sports in general, I avoided athletic activities out of terror, not disinterest”.” (Sports Participation Statistics Among LGBTQ+ Youth, 2021).

Homophobia also has detrimental effects on straight people—and it may seem a little weird to shift the focus onto heterosexuals when discussing homophobia, but it is still a very real issue causing harm. Homophobia often limits straight/cisgender people, confining them to rigid gender roles, so that nobody steps outside the bounds of what is and isn’t socially acceptable in fear of being punished. It limits the ability for people—often straight men—to form close, intimate friendships with members of the same sex in fear of being perceived as gay. Heterosexual may also feel pressured to perform sexual acts even when they don’t want to, in order to ensure they are perceived by others as ‘normal’

What may just appear to be childish humour or harmless ribbing is actually a tool used to maintain the homophobia that has deeply been rooted in our society’s culture, and it only serves to cause the members of our society further harm. In order to truly protect and support queer people, we need to deconstruct the language that we and others around us use, so that we are able to build a more safe and inclusive tomorrow.